how can you stand me?
honestly how?
i dont like me
stirke that i hate me
i wouldnt be firends with me if i met me in the street
i wouldnt want to deal with someone so selfish and shallow and horrible as me
how can i be so frekaing horrible
behind all the words that spring from my keyboard
behind all the empty "ily"s and "<3"s
im just thinking about myself
why cant i get the fuck over myself
why cant i let my self fel okay in knowledge you care
why cant i help but hate you think im so nice when i know different

why am i still doing this to myself
i should know better then eating this shit
iw as doign so well
i need to stop
i need to limit myself to two meals
then one


fuck this life
fuck today
fuck tomorrow
i just want to be free

im paranoid and petrified
i dont know how to live
i cant deal unless something isnt going right
i need the pain to know im alive
its anywonder i haevnt hurt mysewlf yet
i know that i need the pain
i guess its lucky im accident prone

today i broke a glass by accident
i wanted to keep the jagged remains
but how hte hell do i explain that