the shower sloves everything
it washes out the hurt
the water mixes with the tears
numbing pain and hiding fear

never trust internet quizes
they just might tell you what you knew but couldnt admit

theres always the people you miss more then others, always the ones you wish were always around
i wish i didnt have to miss you.

sometimes when i listen to a song i get distracted and miss half of what i wanted to hear
sometimes its the same with you.
i cant be bothered listening to the crap to hear the one piece of useful information

oh the things we take for granted
the people we thought would always be
int hte places we thought would always exist

i hate the way somethings change.
i hate the new playground to replace the old "unsafe" one
i hate that the old playground had memories the new one cant rekindle.

stress relief is a dish best served bitter

the lies of perfectionists are ment to inspire.
the lies of a lover confuse and deny
the words of a poet form the heart of a sait
the sins not as strong and the lies that they paint

now for some letter to people who will never read this:

1. sometimes im just not in the mood for your shit. you need to grow up. your not a kid anymore, this is serious. we're all out on our own soon, some of us will sinck some will swim. call me a moody bithc if you want but at least i know the reality that awaits me. i know the chances of me actually achieving my dreams, and im ok with that. but you, you've been handed everything on a silver platter. all the "work" you do at school comes down to nothing when you dont have enough common sense and maturity to get the job done

2. what the fuck. you are the oldest out of all of us yet you are running around liek a 15 year old who just realised guys dont have cooties. you need to grow up and stop trying to fuck everything that walks. you arent "hot" you arent "sexy" your just fucking creppy, and i say that as a friend who knows you.

3. when did things change? when did we stop thinking the same and start having to comproise to fit each others ideas? why did this happen? i just dont get it.

4. i dont get why you have to be so god-dam mean. i never did anything to you. hell ive been nice to you all the time. so what do you have against me? you need to grow up and get over what ever pitty thing you have against me. im passed being treated like dirt because have an issue your too immature to talk to me about.

5. you need to stop hiding behind your excuse. you say you want to talk about it, but if anyone but her offers you ignore us. your going to be left with nothing when her mood changes again and shes in love with someone different. your not hot shit either. not everyone wants to know you, especially not now. your going to be very lonely very soon.

6. the rest of you. how freaking blind are you? when someones sitting alone in a corner clearly not smiling or participating in conversation its generally a good indicator they are in a bad mood. dont start freaking insulting me or hitting me because you think its funny, if im off on my own i clearly dont want to deal with your shit. im not in a happy mood

so theres a boy.
theres always a boy
this one wasnt there last night
i only went because i thought he'd be there
when did i become so attached?


i miss people a lot.
if i care baout you i become attached.
when your gone, im lost
i need constant signs that your still there if i need you
i need to remind myself that they are stilll around and are ok

daddies little girl
through good and bad and grey

questions form the answers of everything

how do i let you know i am more then meets the eye with out letting you in, letting you under my skin?
why do i try and tlak whent he words will never form?
since when did feeling normal equal feeling down?
since when did feeling down feel so right?
do you even care?
do you even want to know what love is?
do you want it too?